The sacrifice.
I have noticed that over the recent years, I have taken the role of the organiser. The person who is on the ball all the time. The person who herds the stubborn sheep. The person who has to sacrifice his enjoyment for the enjoyment of the mass.
And I deserve some remuneration. I'm the best organiser there is. I started an orchestra last year from SCRATCH. Our first ever rehearsal was a meagre 4 people playing Beethoven's 5th Symphony. And our coming concert will be 47 people playing The Hebrides and Khachaturian's Masquerade. Now that's something. I could've given up at the beginning, and nothing would've happen. Nothing. No one else would be willing to go through the stress and frustration of herding people. But I did it. And I'm satisfied with the results.
In rehearsals, everyone else has a jolly good time, and I really like it that they do. But I have to be on the ball, I need to organise where they sit (because they never know), where their music is, assure everyone that there will be more more musicians to fill in missing parts. And most of all, I find it so irritating when people look at me when the music is hard, or when it's not sounding good. Where were all of you when I asked for help to select music? I did it on my own and with so much planning and thought. Anyway, end of rant number 1. I know I will feel differently after the concert as I would be quite elated.
Rant 2. The flat. I live with a bunch of filthy people. If I didn't live in this flat, I can bet there will be rotting food, dirty dishes, dust and faeces covering every inch of floor and surfaces. It's always up to me, yet again, to be the shepherd. I have to resort to making a rota (which they don't follow). And when I try to enforce it, they glare at me. So in the end, I clean up most of the things. I do the dishes, again and again, and again. And they don't even thank me. I would like out!
The last one is not really a rant. But I do most of the organisation if our group of friends want to go out, eat, movie, concert, ballet, opera etc etc. Which I don't really mind, because I derive enjoyment in the end.
So there. I'm the shepherd. The one who has to sacrifice.
